Saturday, January 16, 2016
Do we live to die, or are we dying to live?
My mind is in shambles,
my heart is a mess,
confused, destroyed, lost.
How do I make sense of things,
I can't understand anything anymore.
What do I hate? Liers? Fake people?
Myself? Life?
Why have I become so, such a pitiful being.
Social life drains so much,
a pursuit of love, does it reinvigorate?
Yet I desire it so much,
I desire you only, nothing more.
Sometimes I just want to take you and run away to a deserted place.
Just you and I, in nature, no one else to bother,
no more troubles to worry,
only then can I find true peace of my mind.
I don't want to lose you,
when it feels like its happening,
it hurts so much, like the loss of everything,
like I'm nothing once more.
Yet who am I? Who am I to you?
Do I be myself? Or do I improve myself for you?
My mind drifts back ages,
back to pri 5, when it could have all ended,
when all these could never have started,
where perhaps I will be at peace,
where perhaps I will have ceased to exist.
What now? No one has the answers, only the future does.
How much can I hold? How long can I last?
How many more times can I die inside, before I finally do?
my heart is a mess,
confused, destroyed, lost.
How do I make sense of things,
I can't understand anything anymore.
What do I hate? Liers? Fake people?
Myself? Life?
Why have I become so, such a pitiful being.
Social life drains so much,
a pursuit of love, does it reinvigorate?
Yet I desire it so much,
I desire you only, nothing more.
Sometimes I just want to take you and run away to a deserted place.
Just you and I, in nature, no one else to bother,
no more troubles to worry,
only then can I find true peace of my mind.
I don't want to lose you,
when it feels like its happening,
it hurts so much, like the loss of everything,
like I'm nothing once more.
Yet who am I? Who am I to you?
Do I be myself? Or do I improve myself for you?
My mind drifts back ages,
back to pri 5, when it could have all ended,
when all these could never have started,
where perhaps I will be at peace,
where perhaps I will have ceased to exist.
What now? No one has the answers, only the future does.
How much can I hold? How long can I last?
How many more times can I die inside, before I finally do?
your love is like a shadow at 9:48 AM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Tuesday, December 22, 2015
State of Mine
Just when I got over a crush
you came into my life.
Like the winter breeze
you froze all time before me.
Everyday, I awoke to your presence, your image, your laughter.
Was this yet another crush,
or had I found love once more.
Our interest matched;
your love for anime, our love for the simple designs.
Even during dinner at the pizza place,
we both ordered risotto even though you had placed your order before I arrived.
Even the drinks, your banana milkshake, and mine was black banana.
Was this not a sign? I wonder.
Was this a dream, a dream that i dreaded the end.
And the end or what seemed like it loomed in the distance - 20th dec marked the end of the trip.
I got anxious, I drew up plans in my mind.
I gave up staying with my close friend, I drifted towards you, or rather i swam.
Not this time, I thought, this time, I'm going for you.
Should I ask you out at the airport, but you left before I could.
All night I stared at the ceiling in the dark, thinking bout you.
Thinking about the night we spent watching Insidious together,
about the first moment you grabbed my arm
about the second, and I held you back, heart racing,
about the running man we watching after it all.
How could I forget sitting next to you at the back of the bus on the ride back to the airport,
with you so close to me, the three times you fell asleep, waking up the first two times due to the heat,
and the third due to the rain.
How can I forget your heavy breathing, how can ever forget you.
Our families so similar, my mum was like your dad
your chou chou u missed so much.
21 Dec, morning, I decided to take the dive,
to go for you.
But...you said it was too sudden, too fast, that we barely knew each other.
I had my reasons, I didn't want us to drift apart, the fear of losing you, made me so desperate.
I was no longer my cool self, love? or the search for love overwhelmed me.
But you were so kind, calling my haste cute,
I can only wish this isn't the end, or the start of awkwardness,
I will only wish that this friendship will blossom into something more
into a relationship where I can pamper you,
where you can be my girl,
where we can be together.
Tomorrow, another day,
hope there will be.
you came into my life.
Like the winter breeze
you froze all time before me.
Everyday, I awoke to your presence, your image, your laughter.
Was this yet another crush,
or had I found love once more.
Our interest matched;
your love for anime, our love for the simple designs.
Even during dinner at the pizza place,
we both ordered risotto even though you had placed your order before I arrived.
Even the drinks, your banana milkshake, and mine was black banana.
Was this not a sign? I wonder.
Was this a dream, a dream that i dreaded the end.
And the end or what seemed like it loomed in the distance - 20th dec marked the end of the trip.
I got anxious, I drew up plans in my mind.
I gave up staying with my close friend, I drifted towards you, or rather i swam.
Not this time, I thought, this time, I'm going for you.
Should I ask you out at the airport, but you left before I could.
All night I stared at the ceiling in the dark, thinking bout you.
Thinking about the night we spent watching Insidious together,
about the first moment you grabbed my arm
about the second, and I held you back, heart racing,
about the running man we watching after it all.
How could I forget sitting next to you at the back of the bus on the ride back to the airport,
with you so close to me, the three times you fell asleep, waking up the first two times due to the heat,
and the third due to the rain.
How can I forget your heavy breathing, how can ever forget you.
Our families so similar, my mum was like your dad
your chou chou u missed so much.
21 Dec, morning, I decided to take the dive,
to go for you.
But...you said it was too sudden, too fast, that we barely knew each other.
I had my reasons, I didn't want us to drift apart, the fear of losing you, made me so desperate.
I was no longer my cool self, love? or the search for love overwhelmed me.
But you were so kind, calling my haste cute,
I can only wish this isn't the end, or the start of awkwardness,
I will only wish that this friendship will blossom into something more
into a relationship where I can pamper you,
where you can be my girl,
where we can be together.
Tomorrow, another day,
hope there will be.
your love is like a shadow at 1:42 AM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
Her Butterfly Effect
I know that it was not love at first at sight
but then you kept catching my eye
and now I can't get you outta my mind.
I don't know when it started
way back when? I wonder.
You won't what I thought I wanted
the anti-thesis of maturity.
But now I can't get over your playfulness
a fun size pack with a laughter than I'll never forget.
You're so small, so cute, so beautiful
no matter what you do you've got that angelic halo.
I think I'm falling for you.
We've been messaging and chatting
but your responses have been falling.
I hate it when you talk about the girl you've been shipping me with
when all I want is to be with you.
I afraid you'll turn cold when I'm burning for you
Don't dim the light in me when I've finally stepped outside the dark.
Its taken me so long
to finally take the dive once more,
I just wanna get that feeling
that feeling of love and true happiness.
The void inside of me
will you fill it for me.
Can I smile for real once more
and I'll make you smile many more.
but then you kept catching my eye
and now I can't get you outta my mind.
I don't know when it started
way back when? I wonder.
You won't what I thought I wanted
the anti-thesis of maturity.
But now I can't get over your playfulness
a fun size pack with a laughter than I'll never forget.
You're so small, so cute, so beautiful
no matter what you do you've got that angelic halo.
I think I'm falling for you.
We've been messaging and chatting
but your responses have been falling.
I hate it when you talk about the girl you've been shipping me with
when all I want is to be with you.
I afraid you'll turn cold when I'm burning for you
Don't dim the light in me when I've finally stepped outside the dark.
Its taken me so long
to finally take the dive once more,
I just wanna get that feeling
that feeling of love and true happiness.
The void inside of me
will you fill it for me.
Can I smile for real once more
and I'll make you smile many more.
your love is like a shadow at 10:33 PM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Monday, May 25, 2015
Questions upon answers upon oneself
Been wondering if I should begin writing in this spot again
it doesn't matter if its a dead blog
after all, I'm just writing for myself;
spell out my thoughts, my worries, my words unspoken.
A place all to myself
spell out my thoughts, my worries, my words unspoken.
A place all to myself
no commitments, no pressure - my hideout, my serenity.
A place to find my true self amongst my other.
A place I can truly be honest
A place I can be me.
A place I can be me.
your love is like a shadow at 12:48 AM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Sunday, May 3, 2015
The Past, the Present, the Future
Do I live in the past,
haunted by my mistakes.
Or do they construct my present, paving my future.
History, a memory,
perhaps its what's most true and honest.
5 years on, what has changed, many.
But what doesn't change is the memory.
Have I changed, for better or for worse?
Time seems so distant, ever changing,
so mysterious yet tranquil.
The serenity I seek flows within it,
a peace of mind and matter I so treasure,
A figure of composure I maintain.
But is it all a lie, a bluff, a trickery upon oneself,
for beneath it all, a myriad of contradictions implode.
Divided from within, a mind living in the past, a body in the present,
what of the future?
History truly is what makes me,
it ties my past, present and future all in one.
My future job, current major and previous images,
I can never escape History.
haunted by my mistakes.
Or do they construct my present, paving my future.
History, a memory,
perhaps its what's most true and honest.
5 years on, what has changed, many.
But what doesn't change is the memory.
Have I changed, for better or for worse?
Time seems so distant, ever changing,
so mysterious yet tranquil.
The serenity I seek flows within it,
a peace of mind and matter I so treasure,
A figure of composure I maintain.
But is it all a lie, a bluff, a trickery upon oneself,
for beneath it all, a myriad of contradictions implode.
Divided from within, a mind living in the past, a body in the present,
what of the future?
History truly is what makes me,
it ties my past, present and future all in one.
My future job, current major and previous images,
I can never escape History.
your love is like a shadow at 12:17 AM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Sunday, March 14, 2010
March Holis
Clay shooting was fun!
Had to shoot 'rabbit', 'bird' and 'rocket.
Shotgun's recoil was nice, funny to see the gals
all jerk to back after each shot lol.
Guess hitting 4/12 is not bad?
Bought my new floorball stick and sneakers too!
Dark green rocks!
Watching Iris now! Damn nice!
When you look at me
what do you see
A distance memory or a reality.
-By an up-and-coming poet.
Had to shoot 'rabbit', 'bird' and 'rocket.
Shotgun's recoil was nice, funny to see the gals
all jerk to back after each shot lol.
Guess hitting 4/12 is not bad?
Bought my new floorball stick and sneakers too!
Dark green rocks!
Watching Iris now! Damn nice!
When you look at me
what do you see
A distance memory or a reality.
-By an up-and-coming poet.
your love is like a shadow at 8:12 PM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Class: 10.37pm
Ya if u're thinking
dats my class name lol.
Homeworks are beginning to pour in
time to finally get serious i guess.
Here are some random pics!
XMS 'fire on CNY celebrations day
Spot XMS 'ambulance in the pic!
NYJC's fountain from the top
The final moments of CherryBlossem pizza
Gasper spills 2X
dats my class name lol.
Homeworks are beginning to pour in
time to finally get serious i guess.
Here are some random pics!
XMS 'fire on CNY celebrations day
Spot XMS 'ambulance in the pic!
NYJC's fountain from the top
The final moments of CherryBlossem pizza
Gasper spills 2X
your love is like a shadow at 9:26 PM
0 said we can't be wrong together
0 said we can't be wrong together